11 September 2009 - Wounded.

Hello people, how are ya all?.. Its Sam pillow talk again.. Just wanted to share my feeling with all of you for those who reading my blog.. Keke.. As you know, I'm fall for a girl recently. Huhu, if you wan to know more you can try read my previous blog "Pillow Talk" but it is very very long kay ! So, is up to you ya. Today, I'm wounded once again, but I know this will happen anyway.. Kekeke.. I know that she doesnt like me at all, I noe i'm not her type. Perhaps i'm not a good talker as well.. So, I'm already scare her away. Sometimes, I ask myself. Why are you making urself suffer like this just because of a woman, you're still young, still got long way to go, your career, job, money, family. Try to think that people who are more worst than your situation. I always think tis, but thats not the main point you know? Just like, when u like someone. Everything that person do, will really cause u lot of impact but not what career or what bla bla bla. That person just like everything for you.. You, understand what am i trying to express? Maybe for me, when i like someone. That people just everything, u won't even care the others.. you just wanted to stay with that person, thats all.. can u people understand? Sighs..sumtime, i rather to say i understand ~ I pain in my heart.. deeply, coz I noe she doesnt like me.. AT ALL. But i noe.. better that keeping her as my friend than losing her away... But... I just very heart pain....

6 September 2009 - Heavy Rain..

Just finish movie from Mid valley.. Well.. Final Destination not that nice as expected.. Sometimes.. I just don't know why I like to think alot.. I believe something that is not going to happens... I wonder why?.. I always told myself, friends between friends will not lie against each other.. But I noe this won't be happen.. because everyone is self-fish...人不为己,天诛地灭.. This is so truth.. It is, but just depend on how much u think on it.. Right? I always take things seriuosly.. Especially loves... Maybe I do really like that person.. So I care everything around her, everything happen on her.. My friends told me, "why are u always take this so seriously?" I reply him, "Because, i really like her.. Just like how you go after the girl u like last time, won't you be the same as me?" I don't know, either this is wrong or what.. But atleast I know myself, still care about her so much.. But everytime I saw them.. Sighs, just make me can't stop thinking those stupid things.. What I can blame.. Blame myself, not capable to do what people can do.. Jealousy is all I know .. But, I'm not emo-ing right now.. I just feel wanna share this feeling with all my friends... I don't wanna lost anyone I love... My Friends... My family.. The girl I love... I don't wanna lost you all.. Not even 1 of you... Because you all really mean alot for me.. Especially my family and my buddy... I love you..Maybe the time haven't come yet, but I believe.. The day will come... Just I don't know when it is... I just try to be who am I, to draw your attention.. Even just a lil talk.. chat and smile from you, it already can makes me happy for very long..Because, it is precious than everything comes to you... Don't you feel that too if your love one do this on you :)

2 September 2009 - Pillow Talk.

Long time didn't post already.... huhu.. Today suddenly feel like want to post ya... Recently.. I fall in love with a girl... Well, we call her Ms.F .. a very friendly girl.. like to smile.... very good girl... She's a friend of my buddy... First sight she gave me.. Make me feels like she very hard to appear... I mean.. got close to her.. But then... That day... 20 August.. We went out together with my few friends .. And my friend intro her to me... After the conversation we have.. I feel that.. She's really unexpected like those girl I've met.. Materialistic, realistic .. and Etc.. But she really didn't give me feel this way... Then .. After I send her back.. I really enjoy talking with her.. even i'm abit drunk that time.. Haha.. On the next time.. I add her MSN ... And we chat... Finallys, after few days.. I realize fall in love on her, i noe it is way too fast since i only noe her for few days.. My buddy tell me " Dude, how long u only noe her? Wake up la" I know man .. I know.. What I can do?? If my mind keep thinking of her.. And I noe.. She have a bf name ... We call him Mr.L here... But Ms. F accept Mr.L because of Mr.L being aggressive on her.. Like acting her Boyfriend already before she tell anything.. I was like.. WHAT??.. She also told me.. She don't know whether she lik him or not .. So she wanna to tell him to hold the relationship first.. but.. Mr.L do not wanted to.. because he feel this is really nonsense.. Few days after.. They've argue ... So, i've decided to ask Ms.F out.. I did and she agree to go out with me also.. I was damn happy that time.. But also damn nervous because this is really my first date with girl except my cousin... I ask for opinions from my buddy.. What i shud do .. What shirt i shud wear and etc etc..And still I dont noe how to go her house and go The Garden from her house.. Hehe .. Damn funny rite?.. 28 August ... Friday... Finally the date is come ... I will arrive her house on 1pm.. but i wake up at 10am.. Coz i didnt sleep at all.. Jahaha.. Too nervous man~ So i sit and wait.. then bath .. and i start my engine around 11.45am i have to leave early because i dont really know the way to go her house.. kekeke.. So i bring my brother Navigator ( even it dont really help ) haha.. So i drive.... ow shit.. i got wrong way.. I call my buddy.. tolong !! then he say he will show me the way and ask me wait for him.. Ok finally he came and then we reach her house.. And she's late for the date since she wake up late ( as usual.. this is how cute she's! keke..) hahaha, then we're guessing what clothe she's going to wear .. I guess it black.. he say red.. Who noes she really wear pink colour clothes ( same as mine, but I'm red in square ) .. Walaoeh, couple shirt meh?? Haha.. So damn sked u noe.. Then.. my buddy show us the way to The Garden as well.. Thanks Man, u help me alot here. So.. I told her.. since u late for almost an hour.. I wan to punish you.. F :" what kind of punishment u wan to do? hehehe" Me:" How about being my gf for 1 day?" F:" Noway.. hahaha" At the moment i noe myself is joking.. but in the sametime.. I also heartbroke.. Hehe... Ok la.. skip da part..AFter ward.. we go walk around.. then we saw a shop.. full with Domokun !! Ms.F:" wahh~~ So many domokun~~ So cute !!!" i was like.. wow, didnt expect that she like domokun.. huhu.. Untill we 2 ppl go sing k.. I sang a song for her.. jay Chao - 开不了口 to her... I change the lyric inside.. haha ~ To her name and my name.. Hehe ! I noe its lame, dont laugh but its look great for me ok? Lols.. Ms.F sing very well.. huhu~ We sing SHE song together.. keke.. really happy.. But.. happy moment always end faster.. Her Mr.L sms her.. then bla bla bla bla.. They break.. That Mr.L send this msg to her.. Since u dont wan to talk, i guess we're finish now. Enjoy your moment with the other guy. Bye ( sumthing like this about the msg i barely can rmb) I dont noe i shud b happy or sad.. Coz I'm like a bad guy who seprate them but in the same time .. I noe that Mr.L didnt respect her at all.. I don't want her to get hurt from this Mr.L .. After that.. She say she very cold.. I was thinking.." i forget to bring my jacket down from the car.." So i told her i got sumthing to do, i go out for 5 min. Then i rush back to my car.. before that.. I drop by at the shop which sell domokun ( the doll ) .. I think she might like this big 1.. So i buy .. and ask them to pack up.. (wish she can be happy with this doll).. Ok.. Continue to take jacket to her.. Done.. Then we finish sing k.. and i told her, i got a friend birthday so i bought her a present.. And ask her to take the present with me.. huhu, then we go and take the present after our dinner.. I told her, actually this present is for my friend who feel unhappy.. Then she asked me who, i hang over it to her. Then she was like.. OMG, why u buy for me? I'm happy leh i didnt feel unhappy.. I say ya ka? keke, u're not going to reject my present rite or i just left it here let ppl take it. haha, she accept it after all.. kekeke.. I saw her smile.. so sweet for me, just that moment. I feel that i'm really happy while looking her face with smile.. Huhu~ After that .. we go starbucks .. and wait for our movie .. around 10pm.. and few of my friends .. coming.. keke.. we watch up.. after 30 mins we watch, that Mr.L call her again.. no choice.. she go out and talk to him.. So i follow up.. As well as my friend.. After the phone talk with him.. We all feel very down .. Cause i saw her very upset.. Ofcause.. Me too... But in the end, still carry on... After our date, 5 of us went to Cheras "small genting" .. have a lilttle chichat and view over there.. that Mr.L .. Call Her again ( Shit i'm kinda piss off with that guy...) Stll calling him Dear! Wtf.. i thod he's the one who say finish.. ( then manythings happen, all i can do just giving her idea and comfort her.. Ofcause i did ask her think wisely whether she want to keep her or not..) Then finally she really reject that person adi.. (after that we back home) She sms me, she really love that domokun ( the doll ) which i present to her.. hehehe, i feel so happy .. So.. untill now~ i still chat with her on msn.. everyday.. every of her words on msn.. would really affect my mood ... even.. She's jsut sumthing.. just a lil care on me like asking me bkful.. can really make me happy for 1 -2 days... but also.. a simple sentences.. also make me emo like fuck.. I'm sorryy Ms.F .. I noe sumtime i do really make u afraid of me coz of my Emo... I'm Sorry... We both say.. Sorry is our forbidden word.. i didnt say it infront of u but i said it here.. I'm so sorry.. Today.. I really make her afraid of me... And because of my Emo.. I've lost someone i love.. i care.. i want to be with... Maybe I shud try not to be emo as always?.. But i jsut cant .. Even i promise her b4.. I jsut can't.... Sumtime just hate myself being so emo.. Sighs.. F... I noe u doesnt like me.. I'm not your type..I know.. I understand...But you can't stop me from liking you rite.... Hehe.. Anyway...Thanks u for still will chatting with me... And sorry i making u hard to do sumtime... All I can say is.. Thanks And Sorry.. F...